Confession: I have a friend who likes to text me at like 4am when he’s had nightmares or he can’t sleep or he just needs a friend. He thinks I’m always awake at 4am but really I go to bed around 12am and I change his text-tone to the loudest one I have just so it wakes me up when he needs me.
you’re the kind of friend everyone needs
When you get to a certain point in your life you stop & think, why am i still doing this? Whether it be a job, marriage, or an addiction. Of course getting over & stopping an addiction is much harder than just quitting your job but sometimes it’s something you just have to do for yourself. Unlike a drinking addiction, getting over a self harm addiction is usually a lonely process that people go through. There are ups & downs & relapses & many tears shed during the recovery process but the outcome is something you’ll never forget. Today i am 1201 days, 36 months or 3 years clean to date. Even though i’m so many months clean I feel the need to continue counting. Alcoholics in recovery count for up to 20 years plus. Why can’t i? It’s something i had to deal with, something i have to live with. Sure the scars are FINALLY starting to fade but they’re still there; & the emotional scars will last a life time. I never imagined myself EVER getting to where i am today. I remember when i was like “i’m gonna try it. fuck it.” Day 1. Day 5. Day 10. Everyone starts out at single to double digit numbers. Don’t think that i’m just 3 years clean by accident. I had to work my way up to it…i actually had to live the 3 years without harming myself. When people on here tell me “i’m only 1 month clean! I wish i was like you” 1. month. clean. Do you realize how amazing that is? Sure, 3 years is great too but so is 1 day or 5 weeks. Any amount of clean days you have is amazing. Don’t compare yourself to others. One day you’ll realize “wow, remember when i was 1 month clean? Now i’m 11 months clean” it’ll be one of the most freeing experiences of your entire life. I want you to have that experience because you deserve it
Thanks for watching & listening to my story